lazy sunday SF musing..

Downsizing: the new apt in Noe Valley/Mission/Bernal

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October 26, 2013. I have relocated from Portland, OR, to San Francisco, CA. Following the stint in Brooklyn, NY when this blog began, I have now circled back on my journey through America and the hipster hubs of America, back to my home state. Since leaving Stanford in 2002, I have not lived here for 11 years. The city has changed immensely since visiting the broadway-laguna crash pads that kolstad, katie, shaneeda and co once lived many years ago, or the 24th st mission apt that plowman, and brett lived in. I came to the city battered and bruised from a the departure from Portland, unanswered questions, closing the book on an epic residency of highs and lows but always enjoyment and learning and fun, great co-residents and co-workers.. the daily commute from Pearl District on the bike, through Flanders St, crossing Broadway gingerly, at some point turning right on 3rd or 4th street and turning another left onto Davis to get to the parkway and the riverfront esplanade- cross the sidewalk, avoid the bumbs just waking up from their slumber, and then racing down the waterfront along with runners, other bikers, and the like. Run it down by the portland spirit, the fountain, the beautiful hawthrone bridgeway looking up one sees 20-50 bikers commuting from across the east side to the west with the same clockwork movement that seems to underlie sleepy grey portland. Speeding toward Tom McCall park where Jazz fest will play in a few days after I leave, making a right and maybe pump a bit to get speed up the gradual incline-- geese in the field below congregating watching us as we watch them. Now biking into the street further down the waterfront then onto the last section of the road prior to Southwest waterfront- a mass of flat fields and constructions that 5 years from now will likely be very different from the concrete tubes and dirt that currently are in place. Cruise down the newly constructed walkway and the dental buildings to my left and see the Portland TRAM. Valet the bike, take a breath, Ride up the tram and the daily meditative view I was lucky to appreciate--and I'm ready for the day. The days were blurs, but come 5 or 6, left with an exhausted look and down the tram, to the bike rack, and back the way we came from. Though maybe pop over the hawthorne bridge to have a beer and eat at Lardo or head to northeast to mississippi and alberta for something at migration or Amnesia... that was the best part- easy rider............now the bike is packed in a POD packed with no where to put it. Debated putting the girlfriend into the POD, but thats for another time. A future less clear. The drive was painful/tearful. What the fuck am I doing? why? did i need to get out? i felt i was being forced out. by my program, by my career directions and opportunities, by my friends, and by my own decision and indecision. the last 3 years have been a blast- sad to go... time to move on...